Any questions? Please….

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Last week I may have been a little rash.  Tiring somewhat from the constant barrage of questions that inevitably make up my daily routine as a practicing professor at the Human Institute, I effectively called to close any line of questions addressed towards me.

Now I can be a stubborn man – so if I claim that I will no longer field ANY questions, be they Science related or NOT, then you can be sure through sheer bloody mindiness I will see that through. However this in itself can generate awhole raft of new problems.

So in an effort to clear some things up, and for any reading this, that might have tried to ask me a question in the last week.

The chemical element for gold is Au. The staff quiz night has been cancelled. Yes I would like some beans with that. No I won’t be seeing you at the weekend. Of course officer I knew exactly how fast I was driving. My name is Professor Charles Human. No I am not being beligerent. Yes I will climb into the back of the van with no fuss. Of course I will move over to make room for you. I am not carrying any ‘crack’. I am ignoring you. I would like you to stop punching me. Yes officer I did start it. Yes I would like some medical aid, quite urgently. No it won’t stop bleeding. Four fingers. 10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1.

Things remain somewhat vague after this point. I hope however that that has at least answered some of the questions I chose to ignore these past 7 days. I now open up once more the doors of my mind – and invite you to come and graze on the grass that are my ideas. School is back in session, pending community service on Thursday afternoons…

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